According to the U.S. Department of Justice, over 354,000 children are kidnapped by a
parent each year in divorce custody disputes. Some of the children are recovered or
returned quickly while others may be on the run for years. Unfortunately many of these
children are never found. Generally, people are concerned with the traumatic effects of
these events on the child involved. However, both the searching parent and the abductor
have many pending issues with which to deal. Some people believe that children
"kidnapped" by their own parents are the lucky ones. In fact, because revenge is often
the driving force for these abductions, the child may become subject to physical, sexual
and mental abuse.
While "When Families Are Torn Apart," is written by Mary Morrissey, the majority of the
article is quoted from Geoffrey Greif and Rebecca Hegar. In the article, Greif and Hegar
explain how they attempted to fill in the gap of information about the trauma of
long-term abduction. Their findings appear in the book When Parents Kidnap. Each
parent, child, and abductor may deal with the kidnapping differently. For some it is
very frightful and requires years of psychological evaluation to overcome. According to
Greif and Hegar, abducted children develop extremely close bonds with their abductors.
Often the abductors lie to the children about the other parent. They may say that the
other parent does not want the child or is dead. The longer the child is away the harder
it is for everyone involved. At these times, professional help is strongly suggested.
Issues for Parent
? their own feelings about the abduction
? helping them to be able to care for the child
? helping them to bring the whole family together
? helping them to help readjust the other children
? helping them to cope with any odd behavior that may be exhibited by the abducted child
? developmental changes of the child
Issues for Children
? trust
? sexual abuse
? anti-social behavior
? why the child thinks the abduction occurs
? dealing with the length of the abduction and the time that they missed with the rest
of their family
? experiences during the abduction
? they child may have been brainwashed by the abducting parent
? whether or not she wants to return to the abductor
? being scared about the chance of being abducted again
? + many others
Issues for Abductor
? anger against court
? anger at the other parent
? anger or confusion about the child's new outlook on them
? sense of loss because they are not seeing the child
? inability to move on with their life
? concern about the child's welfare
? guilt if they think the child has suffered
? realizing the harm they have done to the child
? dealing with the behaviors that led to the abduction
The article, "Parents Who 'Kidnap,'" recaps specific cases of parents attempting to
recover abducted children. In the first case, Sandy Kearns is searching for her son
Joshua who had been abducted by his father. Sandy's husband had run off with his son in
the past. She was told by police that it was a civil matter and received no assistance.
The next afternoon she was told by police officers that her husband had shot her son and
then himself. The next case is about Cynthia and Julian Smith. Cynthia's son Julian
was stolen away when he was two. Five years later, abused both sexually and emotionally,
Julian was rescued by his mother. Julian has receive endless hours of psychological help
that will have to be continued throughout his life. He is finally adapting to school and
his new life and is making friends. The subsequent example involves Jeff and Autumn
Young. This story depicts how some children's appearance is changed and they are
restricted in all ways from having contact with the outside world. Jeff's ex-wife stole
away with their daughter during his custody case in court. Jeff spent his savings on
lawyers and detectives who could not find his daughter. Shortly after Jeff and his new
wife had a baby, his daughter was found in Florida. Extremely underweight, dirty and
pale, Autumn went home with her father. After all of her medical check-ups and some
sessions of unconditional love, Autumn is happy to be home with "two people who know what
they're doing." The next case concerns Joe, Paula, and Jo-Jo Palancia. Federal law says
that custody decisions can not be overridden by courts in different states. This is a
fact unfamiliar to many judges. Joe Palancia's wife had abducted their two children
after she had consented to allowing them to live with their father. Six years later the
children had been found and Joe was back in court. After $800 worth of phone call
inquiries and $3,000 worth of legal fees, Joe's wife again agreed to let Joe take the
children. His wife eventually spent 4 months in jail. Finally a happy family once
again, Joe, Paula, and Jo-Jo do the things regular families do and their lives have
calmed down somewhat. The last incident involves Steve and Stephen Fenton. Steve agreed
to allowed his wife to take Stephen, then six, to Mexico for three weeks. Steve's wife
never returned with Stephen. Abductions outside the United States do not fall under
American law, but Steve was told that the recovery rate from Mexico was 90%. Seventeen
months of attempted recovery had failed and Steve realized he needed to try something
else. He hired a man for $51,000 to re-abduct his child. When a kicking and screaming
Stephen was finally retrieved, Steve had to slowly rekindle memories to reassure the
child that he was his father. Months later, Steven watches his child play soccer and
despite being looked down upon by his caseworker, is content with the method he used to
rescue his precious son.
Whereas Geoffrey Greif sees abduction as the 'extreme end of divorce,' Deborah Linnell,
a Project ALERT volunteer, calls it 'an extreme form of domestic violence.' I feel that
abductions are the combination of the two. Certainly stealing away with your child
without telling the other parent can be considered domestic violence. You can hurt
someone just as much emotionally as if you had stabbed them with a knife or cut off their
arm. Just as applicable is that this is an extreme, and excessive end to a divorce
dispute. What I found interesting about the reunification process in these cases is that
they are often depicted in both movies and books as a joyful reunion. When if fact, the
assimilation of an abducted child to the family that they have not seen in years is not
always so smooth. I was appalled by the lack of assistance from the police and the
ignorance of the courts. The idea that a parent would kill their own child and take
their own life as well, solely to prevent their ex-spouse from being with the child is
incomprehensible. Both of the articles were extremely informative. The techniques used
to write the articles were equally effective, giving a different perspective on the
stories. The possibility of recovering after an event as traumatic as abduction through
psychological counseling is a welcomed and exciting idea. The course on "Introduction to
Psychology" has opened my eyes to the extent that psychology can go to help make a
difference in the lives of people everywhere.
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